Georgia Rainstorms: Chapter 4
Katie
KateyCat24: Hey Justin I have a question.
RckStr48: Yeah?
KateyCat24: Can you meet me by the bridge?
RckStr48: Sure… why?
KateyCat24: I need to get out of my house and I don’t want to be alone.
RckStr48: I’ll meet you there.
Signing off I get up and walk to the window. Opening it I let the first few drops of rain hit my face and then drop out my window. The ground is squishy and wet, saturated straight through. I walk down the street towards the bridge and where Justin is meeting me.
We always used to hang out under the bridge until the police almost blamed us for doing drugs there, then we found another place farther down the creek. It was a fishing dock that no one used anymore that had a tree straight through the center.
When I got there Justin was waiting for me. Walking down I accept his embrace and then lay my head on his shoulder. He stands there quietly for a few minutes, as if to let me gather my thoughts, and then whispers in my ear, “Are you okay?”
“I have no idea Justin… I’m just so lonely and I miss you and I miss getting to live…” I trail off burying my head in his sweatshirt again.
I stand there and let him stroke the back of my head and murmur in my ear how everything would turn out okay… even though we both know it won’t.
“Does your mom know you left?”
“No… I didn’t tell her, I just slipped out the window and left. She and I were fighting earlier.” I replied, not looking him in the eyes. I know he would tell me to go home if I did, to make up with mom, to get my meds so I could get better. He just cared that much.
“She’s gonna worry about you when she finds out you’re gone…” he whispers in my ear.
“I know but… I want to get out of there right now; I want to be with you.” I reply.
“What’s wrong Katie?” he asks as I start crying into his sweatshirt.
“We were fighting about you, and then we got a call at the house. It was about my dad…” I choked out.
“Why were… Oh God Katie… I’m so sorry” he whispered pulling me in against his chest. He knew just as much as I was guessing at the moment. My mom had let the call go to the answering machine until the guy said he was my dad’s CO and then mom picked up fast. She hung up even quicker and wouldn’t tell me what was going on, for all I knew he could be laying somewhere in Iraq completely unharmed, or he could be in a casket on his way home.
“When does he come home?” he asked softly.
“I don’t know… mom wouldn’t tell me anything once she got off the phone.” I whispered. In my mind I was seeing the day my dad left, before I got diagnosed with cancer, before I found out about my diabetes, before mom and I started fighting all the time. I can hear him whispering, “just you wait, I’ll be home soon” as he swings me around in his arms.
I snapped back to reality just in time to have Justin lean in, wrap his arms around me, and kiss me. When he finally let me go it was as if the world had been spun in circles, my head swam with colors and all I could think was wow, did that really just happen?
“I hope you don’t mind that I did that,” he whispered.
“Not at all” I murmur, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him again, “I’ve been waiting for it actually.”
He wraps his arms around me again, and I lean my head against his shoulder, I can feel his heart beating through our shirts and he reaches up slowly to tuck loose hair back behind my ear.
“I’m sorry I haven’t sooner… I love you Katie.” He whispers, letting his hand caress my cheek.
“I love you too…” I reply.
Just then my phone rings. It’s my mother.
The text reads, “Where are you?”
“You should reply…” Justin whispers, as I tuck my phone back in my pocket.
“Can we go back to your house?” I whisper, leaning into his arms.
“I guess so,” he whispers, his hand slipping into mine.
We walk back to his house in silence, and slip past his mom and sisters up to his room. Looking around his room, I let him wrap his arms around me, pulling me down into his lap as he sits on the bed.
“Now spill Katie, what’s really up? You and your mom used to be the best of friends. Now you seem like mortal enemies.” Justin whispers in my ear.
Sighing, I reply, “She and I had a falling out after dad left and after you asked me out. I had been depressed; she was upset once dad was gone, and then when everything with you happened and I got happier. I think she was jealous I could be happy while he was gone, so she told me I couldn’t talk to you or see you anymore, and it completely destroyed me. My cancer spiraled out of control, my diabetes got really bad and finally mom had the doctors start watching me a lot closer.”
Justin is silent for awhile, the look in his eyes indecipherable. Finally he sighs.
“Maybe I’m more trouble than I’m worth Katie…” he whispers, kissing my cheek and cuddling me.
“Don’t say that Justin,” I whisper back, caressing his cheek and pulling him closer, “You aren’t the problem here.”
“It certainly feels like I’m the problem…” he trails off mid-sentence as Sarah skips past the door.
We sit in silence until we’re sure she’s gone, and then I lean into his shoulder, wrapping my arms around him.
He rests his hands on my back and I close my eyes, trying to remember the last time I was this happy. The only time that comes to mind is the summer of my fifth birthday. We had gone to visit my dad on base, and all the guys had decorated their hanger and thrown me a surprise birthday party. Dad had picked me up in his arms and spun me around, calling me his little princess and set me down on top of the jeep he drove. I smile, and Justin sighs.
“It’s been way too long since I’ve seen you do that baby…” he whispers.
I sit up, and look at him, the truth in his words shocking me.
“It’s been way, way too long,” I whisper, looking down at my hands. It had felt so normal, so right. To be sitting here with Justin smiling like this felt right.
“Justin! Are you home?” Mrs. Carry shouts from downstairs.
“Yea I’m home” he calls back.
We both hear footsteps coming up the stairs, and by the time his mom comes to his door, it’s too late.
“Katie? What are you doing here?” she asks, obviously confused, “Shouldn’t you be at home?”
I sit there, not quite sure how to reply for a second, and then realize I hadn’t answered yet at all.
“I’m having a really bad day Mrs. Carry… I just needed someone to talk to. I hope you don’t mind my intruding.” I finally say, my voice wavering.
Something in her eyes says she knows exactly what’s going on and she stops thinking for a moment, “Does your mother know you’re here?”
“No…” I whisper.
“Do you mind coming downstairs and talking to me for awhile Katie?” she asks gently.
“Not at all…” I reply, standing up and following her out.
“I’ll send her back in a few minutes Justin” she says, leading me down the stairs, “Have a seat, make yourself at home.”
I sit on the couch and she sits beside me. Leaning over, she wraps her arms around my shoulder and I instantly start crying.
“It’s okay sweetheart… It’s okay…” she whispers, rocking me in her arms.
“I’m just so scared…” I whisper finally, pulling away and wiping my eyes.
“Scared of what sweetheart?” she asks, the concern showing in her eyes.
“My dad may have died in Iraq, I may go join him in less than two months and mom and I are fighting for some stupid reason she won’t tell me.” I whisper, dropping my eyes.
“I’m so sorry Katie… I hope he hasn’t. And you aren’t going to die sweetie. You’re tough, you’re doing fine and you’ve got the support of so many people who want to see you get better.” She whispers, reaching out and leaving her hand over mine.
“I can feel it coming Mrs. Carry… I know it’s coming whether I’m strong enough or not…” I whisper.
“Oh Sweetie…” she whispers, wrapping her arms around me, rubbing my back, “Have you told him yet?”
“Told who…?” I mumble through her shirt and her embrace.
“Justin” she replies letting me go.
“I don’t have the heart to hurt him like that…” I whisper, “He would be devastated…”
“He will be when he finds out you haven’t told him yet.” Mrs. Carry whispers, patting my hand.
Just then we both hear the footsteps and the door shutting upstairs.
“Justin…” I whisper, the knowledge that he had heard me tearing a hole in my heart.
RckStr48: Yeah?
KateyCat24: Can you meet me by the bridge?
RckStr48: Sure… why?
KateyCat24: I need to get out of my house and I don’t want to be alone.
RckStr48: I’ll meet you there.
Signing off I get up and walk to the window. Opening it I let the first few drops of rain hit my face and then drop out my window. The ground is squishy and wet, saturated straight through. I walk down the street towards the bridge and where Justin is meeting me.
We always used to hang out under the bridge until the police almost blamed us for doing drugs there, then we found another place farther down the creek. It was a fishing dock that no one used anymore that had a tree straight through the center.
When I got there Justin was waiting for me. Walking down I accept his embrace and then lay my head on his shoulder. He stands there quietly for a few minutes, as if to let me gather my thoughts, and then whispers in my ear, “Are you okay?”
“I have no idea Justin… I’m just so lonely and I miss you and I miss getting to live…” I trail off burying my head in his sweatshirt again.
I stand there and let him stroke the back of my head and murmur in my ear how everything would turn out okay… even though we both know it won’t.
“Does your mom know you left?”
“No… I didn’t tell her, I just slipped out the window and left. She and I were fighting earlier.” I replied, not looking him in the eyes. I know he would tell me to go home if I did, to make up with mom, to get my meds so I could get better. He just cared that much.
“She’s gonna worry about you when she finds out you’re gone…” he whispers in my ear.
“I know but… I want to get out of there right now; I want to be with you.” I reply.
“What’s wrong Katie?” he asks as I start crying into his sweatshirt.
“We were fighting about you, and then we got a call at the house. It was about my dad…” I choked out.
“Why were… Oh God Katie… I’m so sorry” he whispered pulling me in against his chest. He knew just as much as I was guessing at the moment. My mom had let the call go to the answering machine until the guy said he was my dad’s CO and then mom picked up fast. She hung up even quicker and wouldn’t tell me what was going on, for all I knew he could be laying somewhere in Iraq completely unharmed, or he could be in a casket on his way home.
“When does he come home?” he asked softly.
“I don’t know… mom wouldn’t tell me anything once she got off the phone.” I whispered. In my mind I was seeing the day my dad left, before I got diagnosed with cancer, before I found out about my diabetes, before mom and I started fighting all the time. I can hear him whispering, “just you wait, I’ll be home soon” as he swings me around in his arms.
I snapped back to reality just in time to have Justin lean in, wrap his arms around me, and kiss me. When he finally let me go it was as if the world had been spun in circles, my head swam with colors and all I could think was wow, did that really just happen?
“I hope you don’t mind that I did that,” he whispered.
“Not at all” I murmur, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him again, “I’ve been waiting for it actually.”
He wraps his arms around me again, and I lean my head against his shoulder, I can feel his heart beating through our shirts and he reaches up slowly to tuck loose hair back behind my ear.
“I’m sorry I haven’t sooner… I love you Katie.” He whispers, letting his hand caress my cheek.
“I love you too…” I reply.
Just then my phone rings. It’s my mother.
The text reads, “Where are you?”
“You should reply…” Justin whispers, as I tuck my phone back in my pocket.
“Can we go back to your house?” I whisper, leaning into his arms.
“I guess so,” he whispers, his hand slipping into mine.
We walk back to his house in silence, and slip past his mom and sisters up to his room. Looking around his room, I let him wrap his arms around me, pulling me down into his lap as he sits on the bed.
“Now spill Katie, what’s really up? You and your mom used to be the best of friends. Now you seem like mortal enemies.” Justin whispers in my ear.
Sighing, I reply, “She and I had a falling out after dad left and after you asked me out. I had been depressed; she was upset once dad was gone, and then when everything with you happened and I got happier. I think she was jealous I could be happy while he was gone, so she told me I couldn’t talk to you or see you anymore, and it completely destroyed me. My cancer spiraled out of control, my diabetes got really bad and finally mom had the doctors start watching me a lot closer.”
Justin is silent for awhile, the look in his eyes indecipherable. Finally he sighs.
“Maybe I’m more trouble than I’m worth Katie…” he whispers, kissing my cheek and cuddling me.
“Don’t say that Justin,” I whisper back, caressing his cheek and pulling him closer, “You aren’t the problem here.”
“It certainly feels like I’m the problem…” he trails off mid-sentence as Sarah skips past the door.
We sit in silence until we’re sure she’s gone, and then I lean into his shoulder, wrapping my arms around him.
He rests his hands on my back and I close my eyes, trying to remember the last time I was this happy. The only time that comes to mind is the summer of my fifth birthday. We had gone to visit my dad on base, and all the guys had decorated their hanger and thrown me a surprise birthday party. Dad had picked me up in his arms and spun me around, calling me his little princess and set me down on top of the jeep he drove. I smile, and Justin sighs.
“It’s been way too long since I’ve seen you do that baby…” he whispers.
I sit up, and look at him, the truth in his words shocking me.
“It’s been way, way too long,” I whisper, looking down at my hands. It had felt so normal, so right. To be sitting here with Justin smiling like this felt right.
“Justin! Are you home?” Mrs. Carry shouts from downstairs.
“Yea I’m home” he calls back.
We both hear footsteps coming up the stairs, and by the time his mom comes to his door, it’s too late.
“Katie? What are you doing here?” she asks, obviously confused, “Shouldn’t you be at home?”
I sit there, not quite sure how to reply for a second, and then realize I hadn’t answered yet at all.
“I’m having a really bad day Mrs. Carry… I just needed someone to talk to. I hope you don’t mind my intruding.” I finally say, my voice wavering.
Something in her eyes says she knows exactly what’s going on and she stops thinking for a moment, “Does your mother know you’re here?”
“No…” I whisper.
“Do you mind coming downstairs and talking to me for awhile Katie?” she asks gently.
“Not at all…” I reply, standing up and following her out.
“I’ll send her back in a few minutes Justin” she says, leading me down the stairs, “Have a seat, make yourself at home.”
I sit on the couch and she sits beside me. Leaning over, she wraps her arms around my shoulder and I instantly start crying.
“It’s okay sweetheart… It’s okay…” she whispers, rocking me in her arms.
“I’m just so scared…” I whisper finally, pulling away and wiping my eyes.
“Scared of what sweetheart?” she asks, the concern showing in her eyes.
“My dad may have died in Iraq, I may go join him in less than two months and mom and I are fighting for some stupid reason she won’t tell me.” I whisper, dropping my eyes.
“I’m so sorry Katie… I hope he hasn’t. And you aren’t going to die sweetie. You’re tough, you’re doing fine and you’ve got the support of so many people who want to see you get better.” She whispers, reaching out and leaving her hand over mine.
“I can feel it coming Mrs. Carry… I know it’s coming whether I’m strong enough or not…” I whisper.
“Oh Sweetie…” she whispers, wrapping her arms around me, rubbing my back, “Have you told him yet?”
“Told who…?” I mumble through her shirt and her embrace.
“Justin” she replies letting me go.
“I don’t have the heart to hurt him like that…” I whisper, “He would be devastated…”
“He will be when he finds out you haven’t told him yet.” Mrs. Carry whispers, patting my hand.
Just then we both hear the footsteps and the door shutting upstairs.
“Justin…” I whisper, the knowledge that he had heard me tearing a hole in my heart.